Make the Most of Pivot Points

from "I Need Coffee" on the Huffington Post

Attorney Katie Rose Guest Pryal writes the blog I Need Coffee, a blog covering all things writing with the aim toward how to make a living writing. Katie is also the author of Entanglement: A Novel and Love and Entropy: A Novella and a contributor to the Chronicle of Higher Education, The Toast, Dame Magazine, and other national venues.  She recently discussed ways climb out of your "rut," banish your "funk" and knock through your "block."  Below is a excerpt:

"...So I decided I needed a different metaphor for thinking about this kind of writing space, a metaphor that’s less negative than, say, “rut.” I settled on the phrase “pivot point.”

"A pivot point, at its most basic, is the center of any rotational system.

"In basketball, you plant your pivot foot so you can move while not getting called for a traveling violation. That’s a good thing.

"When you are drawing with an old-fashioned compass, you firmly plant the sharp tip as your pivot point, and then you rotate the clamped pencil around it to create a perfect circle. That’s a good thing, too, so long as you didn’t accidentally stab yourself with the compass point.

"A train engine on a turntable rotates on a central pivot point, allowing something immensely heavy to change direction and head off another way. That’s kind of amazing, actually.

"Examples of pivot points abound. The examples are important because I really want to stop thinking about funks, ruts, and plateaus. I want to embrace these moments as moments of possibility rather than impossibility. (I sound very new-agey and unlike my ordinary practical self, but what I’m suggesting is very practical. Please bear with me.)

"At a pivot point, you do, indeed, stop moving forward. But you also have a multitude of possibilities around you. You pause in your forward progress, and you look around, taking in the different paths, and then pick a new one..."

Read Katie's entire article.

The 12 Dos and Don’ts of Writing a Blog

Brian A. Klems is a published author and the online editor of WritersDigest.com. His blog, "The Writer’s Dig," which covers everything from grammar rules to publishing, is one of the most popular in the writing community.  "The 12 Dos and Don’ts of Writing a Blog" is one of his most read articles.


Thinking about writing a blog? Been writing a blog for some time now and have yet to establish any growth (and by “growth” I mean “increased pageviews”)? Over the past 10 years I’ve refined my blogging skills—that’s right, I started my first blog back in 2001 and it is so embarrassing by today’s standards that I’m almost unwilling to link to it … almost. Blogs for writers are everywhere, and there’s often good advice on them about writing a blog. There’s also plenty of not-so-good advice. It can be frustrating.

Now I currently run several successful blogs, including "The Life of Dad" and this online editor blog. It’s been a challenge juggling them but, by sticking to these 12 specific dos and don’ts of writing a blog that I’ve developed over my years of experience, I’ve been able to establish growth (increased pageviews). I hope they can help you learn how to write a good blog too.


Read Brian's tips here...

ReBlogs: How A Novel Is Conceived

I grew up in western Oregon.  It seemed, at least in terms of natural threats, a bucolic place in which to spend my youth.  For instance, severe thunderstorms and tornadoes there were about as common as the Northern Lights in Georgia.   Hurricanes were nonexistent.  Such storms are born over warm oceans.  If you’ve ever dipped a toe into the Pacific along the Oregon coast, you know it’s water in which Polar Bear Plungers could train even in August.

There were the occasional big winter storms, of course.  But they certainly didn’t bear the DNA common to the meteorological monsters that inhabit other parts of the nation.  I did, incidentally, experience the Northwest’s “Big Blow” in 1962 that hurled winds over 100 mph into Portland.  Scary, but hardly Cat-5 stuff.

We’d get decent snowstorms once in awhile, too.  But true blizzard conditions were rare (see Northern Lights comment above.)

Earthquakes?  I recall a decent little shake in the late ‘40s, but Northwesterners didn’t dwell on such things....

Read the remainder of Buzz's article.

H.W. “Buzz” Bernard is a best-selling, award-winning novelist. His novels include Blizzard (the most recent), Eyewall, Plague and Supercell.  Buzz is a native Oregonian and attended the University of Washington in Seattle where he earned a bachelor’s degree in atmospheric science; he also studied creative writing.  He’s currently vice president of the Southeastern Writers Association.  He and his wife Christina live in Roswell, Georgia.

To Share with Your Readers: Tips for Writing Amazon Reviews

Penny C. Sansevieri, is the CEO and founder of Author Marketing Experts, Inc. and internationally recognized as a book social media marketing and book marketing, and a media relations expert. She frequently offers tips and advice on marketing books on Amazon.

As an author I always, always try to encourage my friends to post amazon reviews for books they’ve read. I remind them that reviews matter to authors. Most, however, aren’t familiar with writing amazon reviews or have never written one.

Another issue, I’ve heard from numerous authors who have friends who post amazon reviews, for which they are grateful, but wished they were more detailed. Many times the reviews consisted of not much more than “Loved this book!” And while it’s great to have fans, amazon reviews like that do little to help a book along. Also, shorter reviews are often frowned upon by Amazon and could get pulled if the review seems disingenuous. Read more about why Amazon reviews get pulled.

When a book has lots of great, detailed reviews, we tend to scan them for highlights on the things that matter to us. That’s how we often buy books. Both good and bad reviews can help us decide, and, frankly, I’ve often bought a book after I read a bad review because what the reviewer didn’t like was exactly what I was looking for. That’s why detailed reviews are not only helpful, they’re a must for your Amazon page.

It’s tempting to ask friends and family to write reviews. They often want to help but aren’t sure what to say. And you may have readers who love your work but aren’t savvy on posting reviews.

You can find Penny's tips here:

What Do Agents Really Want?

from GetPublishedNow.com

Guess what? Agents are people. There is no truth to the rumor that they are nasty little trolls who love, love, love to reject writers. They do not drool and mutter "Mwwaaaaah" (evil laugh) when they send query letters to delete-ville.

In truth, agents are pragmatic business people who stay in business by making correct choices, meaning, clients with projects that are publisher friendly.

Therefore, be sure your query letter introduces you as a writer with a fabulous manuscript.

What do agents really want?

Agents want quality manuscripts to sell to publishers. Period. This need has increased in recent years as multiple avenues of publication, from ebooks to audio books to podcast books, etc., have expanded the market and opportunities for writers.

You may be a writer who continually struggles to get through the publishing door. Even though you've crafted a fascinating story, you are unable to locate the right agent to guide you through the publishing maze. Why?

The answer's pretty basic. Perhaps you don't know how to:

1. write a query that tells your story: who wants what, why can't they have it, and what happens if they don't get it.
2. assemble a query submission packet.
3. self-edit your work to eliminate ALL writing mechanic errors.

Read the remainder and check out the listing of agents seeking clients.

Reblogs: The Two Most Powerful Words That You Can Say To Yourself While Writing

(from io9.com)

“I’m bored.” 

These two words are the hardest thing to admit, when you’re writing your deathless novel, or screenplay, or short story. You’re supposed to be creating a work of timeless brilliance. How can you be bored?

But admitting that you’re bored is the first step to not being bored.

The power of boredom

A lot of writers get really good at pretending that we’re not bored, and it’s possible to get so good at pretending that you even convince yourself that you’re interested in what you’re writing, when you’ve actually checked out a while ago. We put so much energy into motivating ourselves to keep writing, to put words on the page at all costs, that it can be a huge nightmare to admit that what we’re writing is actually not that fun or interesting. It feels like a terrible betrayal.

And a lot of writing advice boils down to “If you get bored, just keep writing until you find your way through it.” Or ways to cover up your boredom, or work around it, or distract yourself from it. Just taking a beat and saying “This is boring” feels as though it goes against the “just write a crappy first draft” ethos.

Read the remainder of this article.

ReBlogs via Indies Unlimited: Almost Everything You Need to Know about ISBNs

Are you considering self-publishing your book? 

Laurie Boris, a freelance writer and indie author, is a regular contributor to IndiesUnlimited.com and she recently discussed the how-to's and what-for's about ISBNs.




One of the most frequent questions I’ve heard lately from self-publishing authors is about ISBNs. Do you really need them? Do you really need to buy them? What are the pros and cons of buying an ISBN versus using the free or inexpensive ones offered by CreateSpace, BookBaby, Smashwords, and other online partners? Let’s see if we can clear that up some.

First, a little background

ISBN stands for “International Standard Book Number.” Early iterations began in the 1960s as a system for booksellers to better organize and track their inventory. Books published before 2007 have ten digits in their ISBNs. Books published after January 1, 2007 have thirteen digits.


Read the remainder of Laurie's article.

ReBlogs: The Author’s Abyss

It occurs every time I complete a manuscript and send it out for comment.  I can’t explain it.  It just happens.  I tumble into something I call "The Author’s Abyss", a sinkhole of self-doubt.  It’s recurring epiphany I have that, in plain language, reminds me I can’t write worth a shit.

I realize the beloved project–my novel–that I dove into with such enthusiasm and optimism has disintegrated into something worthy of only a paper shredder.  In the beginning, full of passion and fervor, I commanded, at least to myself, “Let there be light,” and a fictional world full of interesting characters and compelling stories began to take shape out of a formless void.  Pulitzer Prize-candidate stuff.

But by the time I’d spread my incompetent hand over the dark waters, and sent my baby out to “finishing school” for critique and comment, I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt there was no Pulitzer in my future.  Probably not even a cheap ribbon for participation.

Read the remainder of Buzz's article.

H.W. “Buzz” Bernard is a best-selling, award-winning novelist. His novels include Blizzard (the most recent), Eyewall, Plague and Supercell.  Buzz is a native Oregonian and attended the University of Washington in Seattle where he earned a bachelor’s degree in atmospheric science; he also studied creative writing.  He’s currently vice president of the Southeastern Writers Association.  He and his wife Christina live in Roswell, Georgia.

ReBlogs: How to Get Book Reviews: 50+ Resources to Generate Book Reviews

Stephanie Chandler, founder and CEO of the Nonfiction Authors Association, is the author of several books including Own Your Niche and The Nonfiction Book Marketing Plan. She recently discussed the benefits of book reviews and how to solicit them.

50 Ways to Generate Book Reviews

Book reviews are essential because they help potential readers make a purchase decision. Sending out review copies for potential review is something every author should include in their marketing plans. The more people who know about your book, the better the chance of building word of mouth buzz. Plan to send out 50 to 500 review copies of your book in both print and digital formats.

If you've been wondering how to get more book reviews, below you will find a comprehensive list of book review sources, including both free and paid options.

A note on paid options: We do NOT advocate paid services that promise to churn out X number of manufactured book reviews based on how much money you spend with them. However, we have included a listing of reputable services that offer quality reviews.

Read the remainder of Stephanie's article

Reblogs: The Writer's Circle: 5 Famous Authors and Their Strange Writing Rituals

(This article by Stephanie Ostroff originally appeared on The Writer's Circle.)

Routines keep us focused when we start drifting off course. They snap us back to reality and remind us that yes, we can do this. The words will come to us. Turning to a familiar writing ritual can help us find balance. Most authors have that one thing they do, even subconsciously, that sets the tone for a solid writing session.

Sometimes it’s as simple as creating the right lighting in a room or hearing songs from a favorite album. It’s the difference between churning out pages of your best work and wasting an afternoon staring at a blinking cursor.

At times, these rituals are taken to an extreme. Some of history’s most celebrated authors swore by unusual and bizarre rituals. It’s possible we owe many great pieces of literature to the fact that they were so meticulous in maintaining these strange habits.

In honor of the writers who embrace their quirky routines, the Writer’s Circle is highlighting a few of the oddest rituals practiced by famous authors:

1. JAMES JOYCE

Crayons, a white coat, and a comfy horizontal surface. These were Joyce’s essentials. The author of Ulysses found his words flowed better while lying flat on his stomach in bed. Since he was severely myopic, crayons enabled Joyce to see his own handwriting more clearly, and the white coat served as a reflector for light onto the pages.

2. MAYA ANGELOU

Most writers can’t afford to check into a hotel when the urge to scribble hits, but for Angelou, it’s the key to great writing. In the wee hours of the morning she’ll book herself a room with a special request: all distracting wall décor must vanish. Armed with a bottle of sherry, a deck of cards, some legal pads, a thesaurus and the Bible, she’s spent hours crafting prose in this carefully constructed environment stripped of almost all inspiration.

3. TRUMAN CAPOTE

The creative genius behind In Cold Blood, Capote was a superstitious man. His writing rituals often involved avoiding particular things. Namely, hotel rooms with phone numbers including “13,” starting or ending a piece of work on a Friday, and tossing more than three cigarette butts in one ashtray.

Read the remainder of Stephanie's article.

ReBlogs: Positive Writer: 3 Game-Changing Tips that Will Help You Beat Procrastination and Get Back to Writing Today

Writer Bryan Hutchinson's Positive Writer offers articles "all written with the purpose of encouraging, inspiring and motivating" fellow authors. New York Times bestselling author Jerry B. Jenkins guest blogged recently on conquering procrastination.

If you’re like me, you’ve had trouble getting your rear end in that chair and writing.

Or if you do get there, the last thing you’re doing is writing.

You don’t have to tell me. I’m a professional procrastinator. I know all the excuses.

We shoo-in first ballot hall-of-fame postponement aficionados love to one-up each other, but before I list my bona fides in that arena, let me tell you what procrastination has wrought in my career:

● By the end of this calendar year I will deliver my 188th contracted manuscript to a traditional publisher—on deadline.

● I’ve had 21 titles reach The New York Times bestseller list, 7 of those debuting at #1.

● My books have sold more than 70 million copies.

Before I do the usual and tell you [that] I say all that not to brag (hey, I write a lot of fiction), let me get back to how accomplished I am as a procrastinator:

● When I’m on deadline, I become the world’s most obnoxious neatnick. How am I expected to write with a messy office, let alone a messy desk?

● Have the backs of all the cereal boxes been read? What about the prescription bottles?

● No, I don’t use pencils any more, but in case I might, all 24 must be sharpened!

● I haven’t been consistent with my physical training. I shouldn’t even think about writing until after a vigorous workout.

● Better clean up my email inbox. Every bit of it. Yes, Aunt Mildred, that is an incredible international scandal, and coincidence, and likely a conspiracy.

● A quick peek at Twitter. A can’t-miss moneymaking opportunity? I might never have to write again…

● And Facebook. I can’t believe that puppy. And that kitty! Oh, no he didn’t!

● The ugliest actor ever born? The ugliest two dozen? It won’t take long to run through those.

● Yes, I am also interested in the largest sea monster to ever wash up on New Zealand’s coast…

● The real mail must be here by now. And it must be close to lunch time.

Right now you’re thinking, Hey, writer man, get to the 3 game-changing tips. Calm down, I’m helping you procrastinate.

Read the remainder of Jerry's article.

ReBlogs: Simply Cappy (Sept 11, 2015): Sackcloth and Ashes

On this eleventh morning of September, we Americans turned off alarm clocks, got out of bed, put on the coffee, did morning rituals and perhaps at some point perhaps we glanced at a calendar.

That is when we recalled exactly where we were and what we were doing at 8:46 a.m. fourteen years ago. It is when we remembered exactly how we felt when we learned of the terrorists' attacks on the World Trade Center. That is when we experienced, just as we did for thirteen previous years, the same sickening feeling in our bellies, the fears, the helplessness, the unbridled anger. 

It has been a very long fourteen years.

That day made such a profound change, whether needed or not, in all of our lives. Every day since has made us look at life in a different way. Nothing will ever again be the same for any one of us. How then, do we deal with the effects of 9/11 as it pertains to us on a personal level in 2015?

Read the remainder of Cappy's essay.

Cappy Hall Rearick is a columnist, humorist and is the author a dozen books, including The Road to Hell is Seldom Seen, 50 Shades of Southern and Hey God ... Let's Talk: Days of Our Lives.  She has stories in several editions of the Not Your Mother's Book series and she writes regularly for Writer Beat, After Fifty Living, and others.  

ReBlog: What Good Sales People Know About Personal Branding That Everyone Should

The words "brand" or "branding" bring images grocery store shelves or maybe memories of a trip to the mall pop to mind first,  not writing, not your work. But writers have to be sales people to sell their work and themselves to clients and readers.  A strong personal brand helps to grab people's attention and keep it all on you. 

Joanne Tombrakos is an author and expert on building one's digital profile and personal branding. She recently published these tips for personal branding on the Huffington Post's "The Blog."

"Personal Branding is not a new concept.

"We used to call it building a good reputation and being clear on the direction you wanted your career to go. Then the age of digital dawned, and personal branding was taken to a whole new level. It's no longer just about the real life version of you. It's also about the digital version of you.

"Good salespeople have always been masters at this.

"The best ones have adapted their strategies to these new tools. Unfortunately there are not that many really good salespeople out there. I see too many using the new tools to automate instead of personalize and applying pushy tactics -- the kind that have always given sales a bad rap -- to technology that if used properly can enhance their image."

Read the remainder of Joanne's article.

Subscribe to The Purple Pros Blog (see above) to receive helpful and informative articles directly in your mailbox.  SWA does not share email addresses with third parties.

ReBlog - Guide to Literary Agents (July 10, 2015): 3 Common Author Platform Mistakes — Plus How to Fix Them

Chuck Sambuchino, a WD Books editor, author and 2-time SWA instructor, writes a tremendously informative blog on agents and publishing for WriterDigest.com: "Guide to Literary Agents." His July 10 blog features literary agent Maria Ribas of Stonesong discussing the importance of platforms and how to do them right.

"When you hear the word “platform,” do you feel dread or excitement? Do you see social media and blogs as forced self-promotion or as an opportunity for conversation with readers? It’s an important question these days.

"More and more, the theory of an author platform—the idea that an author should communicate directly with readers both before a book and between books—is seeping into all genres of publishing. Ten years ago, an author platform wasn’t even a thing. Five years ago, it was important for practical nonfiction authors. Five years from now? Well, my guess is that it will begin to matter more and more for fiction, too. Bestselling authors like John Green, Jennifer Weiner, and Maureen Johnson are showing what can be done when the wall between author and reader is torn down."

Read the remainder of Maria's article.

Subscribe to The Purple Pros Blog (see above) to receive helpful and informative articles directly in your mailbox.  SWA does not share email addresses with third parties.

ReBlogs: When Is It Too Much?

(from MakerGoddess, Feb 21, 2014)

A once popular British TV comedy show featured a pair of characters who seem to be the best of friends. One is in a wheel chair and seems not only physically, but also mentally disabled. The friend is ever so obligingly taking care of him in each skit. The disabled character would make a choice about something (a trip, a book, a holiday destination, whether or not to go to the bathroom at a more convenient time). The friend would then proceed to gently attempt to persuade the man away from the undesired choice and guide him back toward a more reasonable choice. Always the one in the wheelchair stuck to his guns on the inappropriate choice so his friend eventually gave in. Yet every time the decision was carried out you’d see the one in the wheelchair saying he didn’t really want his choice but rather what the friend suggested. And of course the friend always fixed it. Well nearly always. He couldn’t quite change the holiday destination once the airplane was already taking off.

While this makes for great comedy, I wonder, what if this were a real relationship? Would the friend continue to do things with/for the disabled person? Would the friend ever decide to stop arguing with him and just let him lie in the bed he made, accepting his own consequences? When would the friend finally say, “I’ve had enough.” and just walk away.

I recently met a very nice young lady in the beginning years of her career. (Remember recently is always going to be a relative term with me.) She liked her profession but wasn’t very happy in her job and wondered if it would be worth it to make a change, to another location or a different position. She had come under new management at the beginning of the year and thought she might give it a bit longer, just to see if the fresh new blood made her work environment and the job any better. I commend her for wanting to see how the land lies for now, but how long will she wait?

I was there too. Giving just one more reason to stay, and did so for about three years. Finally, I took the plunge and began applying for other positions within my field.

That was scary; I won’t lie about that. I had been in the same position at the same location for eight years! The idea of being anywhere else, doing anything different, actually having to commute, was never entertained. Yes it was a dream come true to have just a one-mile commute! But as the years wore on, and my work environment deteriorated, so sank my acceptance level. Being just a song away from my job became the only good thing I could say about it.

My problem was that I was stuck in a rut of my own making. As a friend of mine once pointed out, I clung to the security of the familiar. Sure that place, that job, stunk to no end, but it was a known odor. If I moved, if I made any waves at all, would I find the same stink or one more foul? Mr. Murphy and I have a complicated relationship. He doesn’t mind and I don’t seem to matter. So his law of things going wrong applies to me categorically. I was just too afraid to take that risk. 

Risk nothing gain nothing, though.

I had to leave the security of my familiar when making not one but two changes in my career this school year as it turns out. That was terrifying! But the rewards far outweighed the momentary discomfort I felt in making the change. The best part was that the second decision to make a change was actually easier for this old scaredy cat. And I made it relatively quickly.

I am now doing a job in a much more conducive environment. So what if my commute is over 20 miles now. At least now as I advance forward in my career I am encouraged that taking such risks are going to not only become easier and easier but also I will be a much happier, more productive individual in the end.

My favorite teacher Ms. Frizzle always says, “Take chances. Make mistakes. Get messy.” Fabulous advice if you ask me. Well, except the messy bit, unless you are very near a shower.

~~Dawn Burr

Dawn is a teacher by profession but a writer by passion. Her sarcastic wit, innocent charm, and insightful reflections will have you bowled over with laughter as she ponders with you the little things in life that make you go hhhmmmm. Learn more about Dawn on her website: Dawn Burr Writes or on her blog: MakerGoddess.

ReBlogs: Literary Terms Defined: The Uncommon and Common

In honor of "Throwback Thursday," we're featuring a timeless article by Chuck Sambuchino, who is a member of the 2014 SWA Writers Workshop faculty,  June 13-17, at Epworth-by-the-Sea on St. Simon’s Island, GA.

(from Writers In the Storm, Sept 11, 2013)

Working for Writer’s Digest Books, I come across a lot of literary terms — both the common and uncommon.

Because it’s healthy for writers of all levels to be familiar with terms they may come across in articles, conversations and contracts, here are some literary terms defined for your enjoyment.

Boiler plate contract (also known as a “standard contract”) – (n.) This term usually refers to an agreed starting contract between a literary agent and publisher. If Agent X sells a book to Putnam, for example, their next deal with Putnam will likely have the same royalty rates and subright splits as the first deal.

You can read the full article here and meet Chuck at the SWA Writers Workshop (details here)!

Writers In the Storm "are a group of  pro and published genre writers who critique and polish our work for submission. In the process, we’ve discovered the benefits of the unique perspectives and strengths we bring to the table."

ReBlogs: The Biggest Freelance Writing Niche Nearly All Writers Ignore

 (from Make a Living Writing)

Have you ever wished you could land a really big freelance writing client? Well, as it happens, there is a truly enormous user of freelancers out there. It’s a client most freelance writers never even think about pitching.  This client generates reams of written materials every year, on dozens of different topics.

Do you want to know who the client is and how to land an assignment? Read the rest of this article here.

Make a Living Writing is a blog by Seattle-based freelance guru Carol Tice, who "started Make a Living Writing because I wanted to share what I’ve learned about successful freelancing and help writers support themselves with their craft. This blog is my give-back to the profession that allows me to pay my bills doing something I truly enjoy."

ReBlogs: To Outline or Not

A question I often hear asked of novelists, at least by other writers, is whether they outline before beginning to hammer out a manuscript. Or, do they just sit down, an idea aborning in their mind, and began to craft their tale?

The majority of authors, it seems, develop some sort of outline. I say, “Some sort,” because there is no standardized style of outline. It’s basically whatever the writer feels comfortable with, whatever gets the job done.

Outline types range from perhaps a single page of scribbled notes to what sounds to me like an excruciatingly detailed delineation: a one- or two-page synopsis for each chapter. Again, there’s no style guide here, no right or wrong way of doing things. If it works for you, it’s the right way.

What works for me is to get down a couple of pages of thoughts, including major turning points, key scenes and the conclusion--or at least where I’d like to end up. In my most recent novel, Supercell, I had two alternate endings in mind and really didn’t know which would work best until I got there.

You see, an outline for me is just a guide. I know I must get from Point A to Point B, but I don’t know how until I start writing. The characters and circumstances dictate my route. That, to me, is the fun of crafting fiction. As Robert Frost said, “No surprise for the writer, no surprise for the reader.”

To draw a military analogy to outlining, I view an outline as a strategic plan, the big picture. I execute the plan through a series of tactics: my writing. And like any military plan, it begins to fall apart as soon as I squeeze off the first round, that is, type the first word.

As necessary, I go back and amend the plan. I change the outline. It’s a “living document” that evolves through an iterative process. The outline guides my writing, but my writing may feed back into changing the outline. This may happen once or many times over the course of cranking out a manuscript.

Once, I did try to march off on a literary journey without an outline. Other people, I knew, had done it successfully. Why not me? Well, it turned out I have no sense of dead reckoning. After about a hundred pages (roughly 25,000 words), I found myself hopelessly lost in a jungle of blind trails, dead ends and improbable plot twists.

My only salvation was to sacrifice my baby to the slashing teeth of a black paper shredder and allow native beaters to lead me, whimpering, to safety.

I now am a dedicated outliner.

~~ H.W. "Buzz" Bernard

A retired meteorologist, Buzz has published 3 novels, the latest, Supercell, came out this fall.  He is Vice-President of SWA and manages our workshop bookstore.  This article was reblogged with permission from the author.  It appeared in Suite T, the Author's Blog of Southern Writers Magazine, January 27, 2014

ReBlogs: Where’s the Chicken?

Note from Emily Sue: "Happy holidays to you! I know Thanksgiving's past but this story [relates to] the yuletide season as well!"

Thanksgiving Day loomed ominously close. Ominously because the clock kept ticking and the hacking, debilitating cough I’d had for five weeks refused to turn loose. Late afternoons found me stretched out on the sofa, exhausted and limp as a noodle.

“It will just have to run its course,” droned Dr. Brunson.

“But—I have to cook for Thanksgiving. My family is all coming in,” I sputtered, they being my three offspring, their spouses, and eight grandchildren, a total of sixteen.

And son-in-law, Bubba, whose prowess in the kitchen challenged mine.

“Why don’t you let them take care of you this year?” my physician suggested so calmly that, had I had the strength, I’d have taken his office apart, board by board.  He, like my husband, Lee, remained clueless to the fact that my “great cook” reputation wobbled on the line here.

Finally, Thanksgiving Day dawned. I loaded up on decongestants and antibiotics, got an early start and by noon, completed part of my desserts, tea, and endless tedious things which comprise cooking.

“Slow down, honey. You’re making enough for an army,” Lee murmured in passing, snatching goody samples and dodging my swats. Yeh, I thought, feeling particularly nasty, but you have no compunctions about dipping in.

Men just don’t get it with the cooking thing.

Every female alive knows that cooking and feeding folks is affection in its most noble form. Not cook?

“No way Jose’,” I snapped at Lee, who’d again suggested KFC or something equally blasphemous. “Our kids and grandkids want to eat Mimi’s buttermilk biscuits and strawberry jam. What about Chicken Bog? No restaurant around here offers anything that even remotely resembles it.”

Chicken Bog is a tradition at our house..  Each holiday, the low-country Chicken-rice-smoked sausage dish dazzles alongside potato salad, cranberry sauce, dressing/gravy, sweet potato pie, and a dozen other entrees.

Anyway, my Chicken Bog and homemade buttermilk biscuits are the only foods on earth that are not Bubba-specialties. Master chef Bubba juggles grilling tools, spices, and roasting meat with one hand and stirs up incredible gourmet veggie dishes with the other as effortlessly as suppressing a yawn.

Anything short of splendid on my part today would be catastrophic.

“Why don’t you cut down this time since you’re not feeling well?”

“You’re talking to a perfectionist over-doer, remember?” I joked listlessly.

Lee swiped a chunk of smoked sausage and when I didn’t react, murmured, “you really are sick, aren’t you?”

“Yeh. And Pam, Bubba, and the girls will be here soon.” The room began it’s afternoon spin but I groped the counter, took deep breaths, then managed to get the chicken for the bog stewing in pots.

“I’ll watch these,” Lee said as I tumbled onto the sofa and spiraled downward into a short comatose snooze.

“This chicken seems done,” Lee’s voice tugged me from fuzzy Netherlands and onto unsteady feet.  I fork-tested for tenderness. Perfect. He tong-lifted the meat to bowls.

“I’ll put these here in the freezer section to cool before I debone and dice the meat.” I did so and whisked cooled potato cubes from the fridge to transform into potato salad.

An hour to go. Measure broth into large pot and season to taste. Add sautéed onions, smoked sausage, then bring to boil. Add rice, cover, steam twenty minutes. Done. More creamy and moist than usual. That’s good. Pot doesn’t look quite as full but there’s plenty.

Buzzer. Pie is golden done. Lee measures coffee into coffeemaker.

Shower. Dress. Cars pulling in driveway. Hugs. Kisses. Laughter.

Shouts of glee—Oooh, Mama’s Chicken Bog! Mmm…. You outdid yourself Mama…Mimi, did you bake biscuits? May I have one now? Hands clasped, blessing said…

Everything seemed swathed in a heavy mist.  I blinked away the darned haze. I did it, by George, despite being so danged sick.  Fulfillment, thick and sweet, stirred inside me. I settled down to pick at my food, eyes heavy-lidded and watery, waiting for the compliments to continue.

“Great Chicken Bog, Mimi,” said Bubba. A comet—with Pride emblazoning it–flashed across my horizon. Then his forehead creased into puzzlement. “May I ask you a question”

“Sure,” I said, honored that Chef Bubba queried me.

“Where’s the chicken?” 

Silence dropped like a thick fog.

All around the table, heads lowered and forks pushed rice around in search of meat. “Oh, no,” I croaked, arose and zigzagged to the upright freezer. Sure enough, there they perched–bowls of cooling chicken, now half frozen.

“Anybody for Rice-a-la-Chicken-Mode?” I slurred, weaving a bit.

Everybody cracked up. “Naw, Mimi,” roared Bubba, having the time of his life. . “Heck, this Bog’s good jus’ like it is!”

We had our first meatless Thanksgiving feast and by far the funniest one.

This, too, shall pass, with Mimi’s spotless reputation restored? Right?

 Not on your life.

That holiday is etched in infamy, spawning a special commemoration. Each Thanksgiving now, when we sit down, Bubba grins like possum road-kill and bellows, “Where’s the chicken?”

~~ Emily Sue Harvey

Emily Sue has published 6 books, including Cocoon and Unto These Hills.  She is a life member of SWA and a former president. Read other blogs by Emily Sue on The Story Plant.

ReBlogs: My Own Little Literary Fiefdom

A good friend of mine who is also an author and publisher recently suggested that traditional thrillers, à la Plague, were my real forte, as opposed to the “tight” sub-genre of weather thrillers in which he viewed me as being “trapped.”

His comments came in the wake of a couple of successes by Plague: being nominated as a finalist in EPIC’s eBook Awards suspense/thriller category, and having a pretty good run up Amazon’s Kindle best-seller list to #37 after a Daily Deal appearance.

As much as I enjoy basking in my friend’s approbation of me as a traditional thriller writer, I don’t fully agree with his assessment.  If I’m literarily “trapped” in the weather-thriller sub-genre, it’s a self-imposed ensnarement.

I wasn’t happy when Plague languished in bookish backwaters for over a year.  There were multiple reasons that happened, but the most important one is precisely because I stepped out of my “tight” sub-genre.

With Plague, as I mentioned earlier, I ventured into the realm of traditional thrillers, a land ruled by Big Names with iron fists (and large promotional budgets).  Think the late, great Tom Clancy, Brad Taylor, Steve Berry, Daniel Silva.  It’s not just that they rule, but their minions are faithful to a fault and loathe to grant interlopers entrance to the kingdom.

In other words, thriller readers–I found out after Plague’s publication–are reluctant, more so than readers of other genres, to try novels by unfamiliar authors.  Romance readers, for example and by contrast, are much more willing to embrace books by new or “unknown” writers.

The bottom line here is that yours truly wandered into a genre minefield and stepped on a Bouncing Betty.

So, lesson learned.  I’m perfectly content, eager even, to homestead within my own little literary fiefdom–meteorologically-based drama–and solidify the specialized niche I’ve begun to stake out for myself.

Supercell follows in the tradition of Eyewall.  (And although I didn’t set out to produce a trilogy, it looks like I’ll end up with one.  I’m currently pecking away at a novel with the working title of Blizzard.)

My goal is to establish a lasting bond with a readership that loves weather thrillers, or at least thrillers based on our natural environment.

So, until Blizzard blows in, I hope you’ll enjoy the excitement and danger of a two-week tornado chase in Supercell.

~~ Buzz Bernard

A retired meteorologist, Buzz has published 3 novels, the latest, Supercell, came out this fall.  He is Vice-President of SWA and manages our workshop bookstore.  This article was reblogged with permission from his personal blog.  You can read his blog and learn more about Buzz on his website: buzzbernard.com